As I was getting ready this morning, I knew that I was going to go enjoy a day of coffeeand writing with my precious little muse on the other side of the table. Lacey is my good luck charm, my happy hope, my little lifter of my heart, and the sharer of happy happy happy. So she bosses me and calls me Mrs. Crazy Lady; she pushes me to write past my fear of having nothing to say.
So many thoughts went through my head this morning so I just thought I would give you a glimpse into some of the things that went through my mind and perhaps you too will say YEP…. she is indeed Mrs. Crazy lady.
MAKE SURE YOU’RE LEADING PEOPLE SOMEWHERE WORTH GOING. I really don’t always want to be a leader but all my life I just end up finding myself in a leadership role. I always say, “Dang! how did I get here again?” I think it was John Maxwell who said that being a leader is something that you have to be…. you just cannot fight it. Forgive me, Mr. Maxwell, as that is my interpretation and not your word for word, but you sure have shaped me. If a leader is what God designed you to be in spite of the fear of it, the duty of it, the pull of it, rising strong in you. So with all that said, I am asking God to help me make sure in my leading, I lead myself and others to a place that is worth going and a life that leads to a peaceful life for all those that follow.
PUSHING BUTTONS TILL SOMETHING WORKS. I am almost embarrassed to admit this but I thought there may be some other button pushing maniacs out there, and you need to know that you are not alone. So here is how it works: I love podcasts and listen to them daily, but for the life of me, I never remember how to find the one I want or to find, how to slow down the talking from fast speak munchkin lingo until I keep hitting buttons till it works. I am the same way with most remote controls. I kind of luck out and wherever I end up, then I am happy with it. I think that is why I am so flexible because whether it be the controls on my car or the controls on my phone or other devise, I learn to be happy wherever I end up.
HAM LED TO BISCUITS LED TO GRAVY LED TO BEAN SOUP. I cooked a whole ham the other day, and it ended up being so good, but there was a lot of it, and then you have that big ole flavorful ham bone. I was supposed to be writing (and remember I don’t really cook nor do I like to cook but really I don’t like to clean up.) But…… I decided to make red eye gravy so then that meant I had to make homemade biscuits to go with it. After I did that I had to make bean soup for the ham bone so that it would find a loving ending for giving such flavor to us. It is like when you paint the room, then the baseboard looks bad, then obviously the floor has to be changed. Dang now the pillows just are not working anymore. It seems that one thing leads to another, leads to another. I found myself making a real big mess, I mean a really big mess in my kitchen that needs painting now and obviously needs a new back splash. So what did I do? I put them all up only to have Scarlett eat the whole bag of biscuits, but the soup was yummy!!!!
Yep all this was going through my happy head as I was getting ready for work.
WHEN SOMEONE DOES OR WRITES OR SPEAKS OR INVENTS DO I THINK OH NO IT HAS BEEN DONE!!! Or do I think oh yahoo, it can be done by me too. Reading other authors inspires me, it also quakes fear and timidity about my own writing. Is it okay? Does anyone want to read it? Should I just quietly shrink back? But Lord I am not a shrunken person… Except for my clothes after I have washed and rewashed them because I forgot them. Yep this is the way my head works…. because a ham bone took me down a rabbit hole of cooking biscuits.
FICTION WRITERS AND HIGH JUMPS DO NOT MAKE ME FEARFUL. I was reading Cold Tangerines by Shauna Neiquest and by the way it is so yummy!! Many little stories within the story of her life. I just love it, but here I am being honest, totally wide open honest with you. When I read fiction writers, I never think “Oh no! They are so good! Could I ever do that?” I don’t think that because I have no desire or creativity to write fiction just like I have never had the desire or the aptitude to do a high jump. I am not built for high jumps so there is no fear of it. When I see how many beautiful words that she uses and all the experience that she has and all the all the all the…. I think “Oh God can I do it? Do I have anything of value to share? Can I make a difference in the life of another? Can I be me in such a way that it helps others be them?” Or do I just make some biscuits and red eye gravy? But again we have already established I am not a good cook, nor am I built for high jumps.
So my plan is to ask God, NO thank Him in advance for giving me something to say. My plan is to take all these crazy morning hair dryer musings and try to make sense of them. My whole plan has always been just to share a little joy and to experience lots of joy… just because. I am so thankful God has placed person after person to love me with all my crazy thoughts and pray that I will high jump past the fear in my mind and write because I have to just like that calling to be a leader, I just had too!!!
ps. Bracelets by the amazing Carrie Rhea and Uno De 50 from Shimmering Seas
pps. Crazy by me and how God made me.