This is the question on one of my many, many journals!!! I love this question in vivid color on my 5 dollar Marshal journal find. I have asked myself this question in not so many words for a long time now.
When I sat on my bed as a ten-year-old and asked God to show me his way and keep me from making some of the mistakes of my family. I had no idea the detours and the roadblocks that would get me to this one Wild and Precious Life!!! I am glad I did not know!!! I may have turned and gone the other way and I would have missed it!!!!!
I remember when I was in my 30’s and had my kids and decided to go back to college and take some control back of my life. It took me forever and one more year to get my degree, but I got it. I was almost at the end of the 8-year journey and realized I was almost there and I had to pull over. I sobbed not because I was sad but because I felt victorious that I stayed with it!!!!
Fast forward and single parenthood and poverty and all kinds of disfunction had me looking to that same God of the 10-year-old. I asked him what did he want of me and where did he want me to serve. I also told him that when I was successful, I promised to share what he gifted me with others. He must have heard me because life started going in a direction that would take me on better roads with fewer roadblocks and detours.
I think back on that 10-year-old and that struggling single mom and the times I prayed I would make it across the bridge in my 500 dollar car to pay my power bill. I remember all the times we ate by candlelight with the food that the church dropped off. I remember having to be okay with the sweet church ladies shopping my kid’s Christmas list. I had to be okay with begging the water department to leave my water on one more day so that I could hustle up enough to keep it on.
For some reason in my heart of hope, I knew that it was not if but when. I believed that God had better things for myself and my family and I knew if I was to serve that I would need more to serve with.
Now as I sit here and have the biggest lump in my throat because I am preparing for a HUGE day at our big beautiful building, I remember that I promised to serve. I am so thankful that I am able to serve and give back a portion of what has been given to me. It is not right that one girl should be so blessed. It is hard to believe that this is really me and this is really my life. I am so glad I stayed with it and waited for the miracle.
I pray that as long as I live I will keep that promise to the God who held me and saved me. I pray as long as I live I will spend it thanking all those precious angels that loved and believed in me along the way.
So tomorrow I will drive to our building with my pretty pink jeep that will not break down, I will thank God as I prepare for “Our Season of Abundance.” Tomorrow we will celebrate our gifts and share them with others and in so doing we will guarantee that we will do wonders with OUR ONE WILD AND PRECIOUS LIFE.
I LOVE YOU AND THANK YOU FOR LOVING ME THROUGH ALL THE HIGHWAYS AND BYWAYS AND DETOURS!!!!!!
One grateful girl…. Karen
This brought a tear to my eyes.
I can relate to much of this, except for your early faith in God. I did not get that until I was in my 50’s. At 20 years old, I married my 18 year old pregnant girlfriend. There were many, many times we did not have 2 dimes to rub together. One memory, driving to work on a Friday, my payday, I had to bum $0.50 cents from a stranger to put a gallon of gas in my car so I could get to work. You know much of my struggle with alcoholism and the challenges that can bring. Finally, I too graduated from college at the age of 45, not exactly a traditional student. With a 3.95 GPA I may add.
Today my life is much easier and I count my blessings everyday. I never would have imagined sharing this with someone outside of my family, ands that is a testament to you.
Thank you!
Ron
I admire you for barring your soul to us, that’s courage and you do it with love and tenacity in hopes that someone will benefit. Thank you Karen