What in the world is it about waking up in the middle of the night and finding all kinds of roads to go down with our thoughts!!!???? And all of those roads are not victorious highways, they are more like wandering and worrisome back roads. I woke up at 3 am and I started thinking, really overthinking things and had to wrestle my little brain and heart and get them in sync with what I decided a long time ago to be true: Worrying and fretting and being concerned about being uncertain will never take me to my highest road.
I know that in my lifetime that uncertain times call for me to look at the things I have always found assurance of. It turns out that when I am most thoughtful and seaking I find the most valuable lessons. I started reading and writing and low and behold this is the message in Bob Goff’s devotion book. Just the title alone will give you the core of the message: We Won’t Know How it is Going to End at the Beginning. Keep Going. Uncertainty is God’s Invitation to Join Him.
As I woke up to that passage I filled in the rest of the blanks. Uncertainty for many of us can be a great place to start. Being unsure of something and not knowing all the steps allows me to just take that first step and then the next one and before you know it I am halfway there.
Us humans want to know the whole path before we even put our first toe on the path. We want to see the end before we begin and that is not the way of faith or victory. Believe it or not, us humans are not the only ones that want to see what is up ahead before we move!!! Impalas can jump 10 feet high and 30 feet long. I would not recommend being in a long jump contest with these magnificent creatures. You would think that they would be a zoo keeper’s worst nightmare. How the heck do you fence this animal in????
Just like us they have an achilles heel so to speak. All the zookeeper has to do is put up a 3 foot wall and they will not jump over it. What would stop this high jumper from mastering a 3 foot barrier???? The impala will not jump unless they can see what is up ahead. Even though time and time again this small height is nothing for his graceful leaps, the animal is paralized by the fear of the unknown beyond that small wall.
There is something about the dead of night when it is still and quiet. I can either take the time to reaffirm what I am capable of or as I almost did, I can recite all the things that I am not sure of and 2nd guess every good decision ever made. I love those little God winks that sparked me to write about Uncertainty and God’s assurance and then to wake up to that very passage in my daily reading. I love so much how life works when we are open and ready to receive.
I can not receive it if I am closed off. I can not grow if I already have it all figured out. Being uncertain is exactly what Bob Goff said it was, An invitation to join God and be lifted by his grace and held by his loving strength. I will remember that next time I wake in the middle of the night!!!!