Bowlegs and Butter

He is looking up because that is how he lived.

He was working out at The Sports Park, well if you can call it working out. He would do a few moves to qualify him for being in the gym so that he could enjoy the desert of the place, the hot tub, sauna and steam room.  As per usual for our relationship I was taking 3 classes back to back and would spend a few moments in the hot tub etc. For Pete’s sake you have to sit down and stay still to be in there and that was not my spiritual gift.

I was single not by choice, as my starter husband had flown the coop. I thought it was the worst thing that could happen to me  but as usual my loving God had a grand adventure right before me. My adventure had the cutest little skinny bow legs and was as slow as I was fast.  

We started running together and before I knew it those little bowlegs were running in front of me and I thought how in the world? You are held together by tobacco and butter, how are you faster than me?  We used to tease Huge because he was never sick and could run faster than me, but not as far!! He seemed so healthy and our joke was he was held together by tobacco and butter. Butter was his main food group, heck he could put melted butter on butter, you get my point.  We thought it would last forever but on July 27, 2018 at the beginning of the full blood moon, those things no longer held him together. It caught up with him and us and he was gone.

If you knew my husband you knew that he was the gentlest and the kindest but the thing that you most need to know is that he allowed himself to be vulnerable so that he could connect and be a light in the darkness. Many people in the addiction community found solace and hope and comfort sitting on the porch with him. They blew lots of smoke that dissipated into the air and the lessons they learned stayed with them in the deepest place of their soul. They learned by being honest and open and vulnerable they could become once and for all the men they were born to be. 

If you are broken then that is a GREAT place to be. God loves to use the broken and better still he uses the broken to help  the broken. The ONLY people that can help their fellow man or woman are those that have walked that path. They know all the things, all the many things that can block your path. They know all the things that can prevent a life well lived. Only those people can look into your soul and say to you I really understand. I am here for you, I have walked this very road and I can take you down a different, more loving and gentle road. I know the places to avoid, I know the places to venture to, I know your heart.  

My sweet precious bowlegged man knew the path, he took so many of us to another place, to a more beautiful place in life. The crazy thing is the darkness and all the heartache became the very thing that showed so much light to so many people. God really loves reaching in and bringing us out of darkness. Once you have lived in darkness the brightness of your new life is beyond explanation.

I wanted to take a moment to let anyone that is out there struggling with addiction or any other thing that blocks the light in your life, I see you, I love you and I am praying for you. I want you to know that there are other sweet people out there that would love to show you a new path to run on. I am sad my sweet bowlegged butter loving man can only help you by turning to his Dad and ask for your blessings as you become the new you!!! The better you. The more loving you!! It is a great adventure. 

Loving you still in a big way!!!! In a forever way!!!

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