Dear Precious ones!!!!
Staring at this blank page for a bit and wanting to tell you why I am so thankful I figured out how to be tranquil in the middle of say… a pandemic!!!! I really never ever thought I would say those words. I also remember thinking I would never check that divorced box and I also did not know that checking that box would change the entire direction of my life. In storytelling I guess it was my inciting incident. It was the tragic plot twist that was my epic challenge that set me towards an epic life.
When I was nauseated and racked with grief, it sure did not feel like an epic change leading to a full and rich life. It felt like death. I was physically sick, I was frightened. I didn’t really want to get out of bed but I had 3 reasons,Britt, Scotty and Sheldon. And of course eating was important and paying my bills and I had no way of doing so in a prone condition.
I learned in that season of my life to strive for serenity over security and that would find its way into every corner of my life. I was forced to learn to find a way to be happy whether my bank account was full or not, whether my pantry was full or not, my bills were paid or not, my gas was empty or not, my car drove or not. And most of those were NOTS!!! Security means that you have all that you physically need in the way of money, possessions or the belief that what you have will carry you through any unforeseen life event. Because this was never the case back then, I decided I had to find a way to reach for serenity.
When I finally took a deep breath, I realized that there is no such thing as security because it is based on something happening on the outside. There are so many factors that must line up to make that happen and all in the right order and the right time. So in the deep breath, serenity tells me that if I learn to be happy and even joyful in any situation then that trumps security anytime. SERENITY IS CREATED WITHIN ME AND CAN NOT BE TAKEN BY ANY LIFE EVENT UNLESS I ALLOW IT!!!!
I don’t mean to imply that it is not wise to strive to do the things we can control to make life more secure. What I have learned and it is amplified as we walk through something we could never imagine: is how do you prepare for every facet and every twist and turn in life? The answer is there is no way but there is a way through prayer, meditation, gratitude, thankfulness and the daily practice of joy that I can find a serene life.
The wonder of all wonders is that when I do get that and live it, I am able to be more creative and energized to find a way to build that epic life I did not know I was building. It also draws to me the right situations and the best people into my life!!!!
Because of that thing I thought was the worst thing that could happen to me, I was given my greatest prize. God blessed me with a beautiful life of striving for more and being content with less of things that did not matter. Hugh Smith gave me a great life, I was compelled to build a business filled with amazing people. That business has been responsible for blessing families, and my community and my family. None of those things would have entered my life had I not walked through that insecure time of hardship and fear. My inciting incident, my turn in my story that I did not know I needed but God and life knew!!!
I believe that where we are right now is no different. I think we are all learning once again to trust that life will have things we think are the most awful and one day we will be thanking God for that most awful that leads to the most wonderful.
I have been blessed by each and every one of you. Thanks from the bottom of my grateful heart that you chose to spend your time and life with me.
So very grateful,
Ps. There is so much more to this story and I hope that in the telling I can share hope with people when they feel there is no hope!!! I promise there is, just hang in there for the miracle. It is coming and it is yours!!!