Oh my, it has been so many many full moons and so many hurting hearts ago. But you know I will take this hurt any day to have had the joy of being your friend and your wife. We were co-conspirators in making sure that people saw the love of God in how we treated each other.
I am thankful that I did not wait till you were gone to shower you with happy adjectives and you did the same. I was thinking on this 3 years eve of your departure of all the things I loved so much about you.
I knew that if you said it, then it was true!!!! I knew that if you made a mistake you would promptly confess and not just say I am sorry, but change the behavior.
You were so humble about your gifts and you freely gave your time to others and did not count and keep up. It was your joy to serve and your integrity was like none I had ever seen or have seen to this date. I never knew anyone like you!!!
How in the world did God love me so much that he chose me for you and you for me? I loved how you called me sweet angel or sweetie. You loved to brag about me in front of me and I am sure you did some of it when I was not around. You looked at me and the kids with the most soulful look of a man who was grateful for all that God had given us.
You were such a brilliant writer, your writing looked like art to me and your words were like poetry. You loved my writing too and you told me all the time. You loved to be at our meetings and you told me what a great job I did just like a proud friend. I loved how you would listen to me talk to someone and when I was done you told me how sweet you thought I was. You told me that I did not belong on this earth but you were glad that I was here.
You looked deep inside my heart and saw the very best in me. You ignored the parts that were not so great!!! You said my heart was the most important thing. You said that I needed to be about my angel work and you were just here to watch me fly!!!
You planted so many seeds and nourished so many souls. My boys are sober because of the seeds that you sowed. My heart is full because of the love that you poured out to me and to others and I will forever be in God’s dept for the gift of you.
I have so much love inside of me and I vowed to pour it out on the world since I can no longer pour it out on you. I have asked God to show me and use me as long as He can while I am here. You believed that our most important task was to love and honor all God’s kids. I believe that I have been able to carry on your legacy of recovery in the prisons and in the rooms of recovery. I think you would be very proud!!!
Happy moon man day and tell your dad I said thanks for all that he has done for me!!!! I am overflowing with all that has been gifted me in this life and am content for I am filled to overflowing and I keep finding things to be joyful for.
Loving you just as much as I did when I wore that pink dress and said I do, oh yes I do!!!
loving and living and praying and rejoicing!!!!your grateful and proud wife!!!!
karen key smith
ps. Remember when I kept on saying your wife and my husband because I loved the sound of it!!!
pps. Remember when I thought you were mad because you called me Karen instead of sweetie?
ppps. Remember all the times you told me that my momma would be so proud!!!??? That made me smile so big then and still does now.