Right now it is 7:50 and for over 4 years this would be the time of day that I am just getting cranked up in putting out my Happy Ass LIfe content. Somedays it seemed to flow and I felt really proud of what I put out there and other days I did not even want to go back and watch and/or listen!!! But each and every day I had something to shoot for, to prepare for and frankly enjoy. The preparation always taught me something new and I am a weirdo that thrived on the discipline of showing up each day.
I made the decision a few weeks ago to stop the daily and start planning for a weekly podcast. I was not prepared for how I would feel after that decision. First of all I believe I did make the right decision for my life at this time. My responsibilities right now are a little daunting and a lot overwhelming at times. I admit this has always been who I am but I am truly trying to be more intentional about how and where I spend my time.
Adding the responsibility of two children 11 and 13 to an already jam packed life I thought I could just keep rocking on!!!!!!!!!! I thought it would be like Jesus and the 5 fishes and somehow mystically and magically create time that was not there.
Thankfully I had a fitness coach and let me say a word about that. A fitness coach? So your fitness coach talked to you about life stuff like what you are doing with your time and all that? So your fitness coach asked you about your general health and wellness and if you had a moment for yourself? Isn’t a fitness coach someone who helps you with nutrition and exercise? What in the world is she doing talking to you about unreasonable expectations and life choices and stress management?
WEll darn, it turns out that our lives are made up of all the things!!! WE can’t neglect an area of our lives and expect all the rest to just be okay. It really does turn out that how we do anything is how we do everything. We all have stress and all stress is not bad, all our lives are a balancing act and we have systems in place to alert us when we are out of sync.
I admit that I am one of those people who thought that the rules of chemistry and physics and just life balance did not apply to me. I thought that because I had a GREAT attitude and extreme resilience and stupid energy that I could just keep on keeping on. I guess in a sense I could have done that. But would that have been wise? I don’t think so. In order for me to do more of what God intends for me then something has to give.
In order for me to use the time that I have left on this beautiful and gracious planet I had to make some decisions that I did not want to make.
I miss doing Happy Ass everyday. I feel a little lost and out of sync. I feel scared thinking about doing a weekly podcast which even though a smarter use of my time is going to take more planning and more intentionality. I am nervous that I won’t be able to do it like I did the other. Part of me wants to shrink back and say, “ You had a good run so just raise the kids and work and play golf, you have done your part.” For those who know me just a little know that I can not do that.
I feel called to continue Happy Ass and grow Happy ass as a brand and a call to love and to action. I want to continue to grow as a human who falls down and gets back up and shouts to others. “Hey it’s okay I will help you up because I have fallen down before, over and over and over.”
So NO I was not prepared for the feeling I have now that I am not doing Happy Ass on the daily. No I am NOT prepared for doing a more organized and structured weekly Happy Ass but thankfully being prepared has never stopped me. I hope NOT being prepared will not stop you from doing what you are uniquely put here to do.
I just figured it out that over the years I have done over 1600 podcasts one day at a time. Don’t forget I am really bad at math so take that figure with a grain of salt. I am looking forward to the New weekly Happy Ass but know that without the support of all you loving happy Asses it would not be possible. I also know that I am so thankful my fitness coach was interested in all of me and not just my waist line. ( Thanks Jen)
Missing you daily!!!
Karen Key Smith
