As you grow, love your wings! Spread them — you may give others the courage to fly. ~ Karen Key Smith
I’m sitting here frozen, staring at a blank page, knowing I need to fill it with something that brings a little light, a little joy, and lots of hope!!!
Over six months ago, I said “yes” to giving a TED Talk at FSU. My audience will be mostly college students — precious souls who, like all of us at some point, are wondering: What can I do to make a difference in this wanting world? Y’all, I have just 15 minutes to hopefully change one heart, one direction, one life. That feels like pressure — but it also feels like hope. Hope that I can boil down the story of my life to the things that truly blessed me and changed me for the better.
Now, those things didn’t feel like blessings at the time. They felt like the worst of life, the mean of life, the unfair of life. But looking back, those were the very moments that grew me, shaped me, and stretched me into who I am today.
This morning, I spoke with a friend who admitted he feels like he has so much catching up to do. His past was filled with struggles, addiction, and years he wasn’t proud of. Because of that, he feels constant pressure to make up for lost time.
I’m thankful for that conversation because I feel that way, too, sometimes — like I’m behind, needing to catch up. (Catch up with who, I’m not sure!) But his honesty reminded me of something important: growth doesn’t come without ups and downs. Growth often feels like those childhood “growing pains” I used to wake my mama up about. I’d tell her I didn’t want the pain — and she’d say, But you want to grow, don’t you? Of course I did. And I still do. But that stretching and aching part? Not so much.
My friend has changed his life for the better, but only after a whole lot of stretching and wing-growing that probably didn’t feel so good in the moment. The good news? If we can accept that life will always involve stretching, and if we learn to love our wings as we grow, then we give others permission to do the same.
When I stand in front of those eager young people at FSU, my deepest hope is that they hear not just my words but the hope and love in my heart. That they see the most important part of my story isn’t just that I’ve struggled, failed, and hurt — but that I’ve chosen to share it. Because when we share our full, authentic selves with others, we give them the greatest gift: the courage to fly, too. And friends, it’s so much easier to fly together!!! Love your wings as you fly,
Karen Key Smith
