Dear Happy Asses,
I am not a football fan at all.
Not even a little bit.
And for someone who was once a cheerleader, I know shockingly little about the game — other than when you make a touchdown, you win, and fans go absolutely crazy for their team. I’ve always felt a tad left out because I never mustered up the love for the sport.
But here’s what I have always loved: coaches.
I am mesmerized by coaches and their stories because they are some of the greatest examples of leadership I have ever seen. It takes extreme leadership to build a winning team — not just in score, but in integrity, belief, and identity. So even though I don’t watch the games, I study the leaders.
And one of the most profound and current leadership lessons I’ve seen recently comes from Curt Cignetti, head coach of Indiana football.
Many of you sports people already know this, but before Indiana, Curt coached under Nick Saban. And when you hang out with great people — if you’re paying attention — you become great people. Curt paid attention. While the world wasn’t watching, he was learning how to lead.
When Curt arrived at Indiana, he inherited what was statistically the most losing program in college football history. The team saw themselves as losers. The stands were only about 25% full. The identity was broken.
And Curt understood something deeply:
One leader can carry belief to an entire organization.
So, he started with language.
It’s no secret that I believe with my whole heart that every good thing I do begins with the words I speak and believe about myself. Curt knew the same was true for his team. He knew that repeated words become identity — and identity becomes behavior — and behavior becomes results.
So he obsessively communicated a new story until it stuck.
He told them things like:
- “I win. Google me.”
- “We will not be surprised by success.”
- “When we win, don’t act like that wasn’t supposed to happen.”
- “Pressure is a privilege.”
- And my absolute favorite:
“This is how winners operate.”
At first, they didn’t believe it.
So he had them practice believing.
Because when you practice something long enough, it becomes natural.
And when you change identity, you change behavior.
And when you change behavior, you change results.
And sure enough — it worked.
Indiana upset Miami last night, and the only reason I even know that is because I went down a rabbit hole of learning how everywhere Curt Cignetti goes, he turns losing teams into winning teams — starting with words, repeated over and over, and lived out loud.
And that got me thinking…
If we want to win at whatever our “game” is this year — relationships, health, work, purpose, joy — it has to start with our language.
It has to be repeated until it becomes our identity.
And then it becomes contagious.
That’s how winners operate.
And I am so grateful to be surrounded by a winning team — people who repeat success, encourage growth, and light fires that are hard to put out.
This is how winners operate.
Grateful beyond measure,
Karen Key Smith
Ps. I had a coach who changed my life, and I pray to become that in the lives of all of you. When you have been blessed, you want to pass it on!!!!
